Category Archive: cheating

Nov 14 2013

What’ll Keep Me Out of Heaven

It’s rare that I hear a song that really touches me and resonates like this one does. Brandy Clark’s “What’ll Keep Me Out of Heaven” got my attention. It captures the ambivalence I’ve felt about prowling. It’s wrong, but it feels right. It’s forbidden, but it lets us access parts of ourselves that have been …

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Nov 19 2012

Let’s Cut Mrs. Patraeus Some Slack

I know you’ve been waiting for my thoughts on the Patraeus scandal.  I’ve been meaning to write about it, but the story keeps changing and more dirt keeps surfacing. It’s a sex blogger’s dream. So, yes, I’ll be sharing thoughts about it in several posts to come, but I wanted to comment now on how the blogosphere is treating …

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Jul 28 2012

The Lingering Trauma of Prowling

By Somewhere Man The picture taunts me at work. Every day. The beautiful woman that I fell in love with last year is still in my life. Only she isn’t. This woman, whom I wrote and wrote about amid the heartache and heartbreak of last fall, now has a prominent spot in my office. Her …

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Apr 24 2012

Why I Cheat

If you’ve been reading this blog for more than a week, you know that I love my husband.  I love him very much. He’s an important part of my life, and I will never leave him.  Never. But our sex life is….I don’t even know the right words to describe it.  There have been periods over the …

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Mar 12 2012

The Care and Feeding of a Mistress

Most men would say that they know how to keep their mistress happy.  The only thing your mistress needs to be happy is regular access to your hot body and the amazing sex you generously bestow upon her. Right? Well, maybe not so much. If you’re talking about a short term (I define short term as two  months …

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Feb 24 2012

Is Compromise Possible?

I know that people make many compromises in a marriage. It’s how you get along with someone else and how you can manage to live together happily for decades.  Of course, there are some things on which people can’t or won’t compromise.  We all have those issues. Sometimes they change as we grow and age and sometimes they don’t. …

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Feb 10 2012

When the Spouse Suspects. . .

So, what do you do when it becomes clear to you that the spouse has suspicions about your extramarital activities? I’m not talking about when you have been caught, but when your spouse is still at the suspicion stage (I’ll write about what to do if you’ve been caught in another post). If you find out that your spouse …

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Jan 13 2012

Comfortable, Predictable, and Safe

One of the biggest advantages of a long term marriage (20+ years) is that it is comfortable, predictable, and safe. One of the biggest challenges of a long term marriage is that it is comfortable, predictable, and safe. *sigh* Yeah, it’s confusing. Comfortable becomes complacent. Predictable becomes boring. Safe becomes smothering and restrictive. Sometimes. Other …

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Jan 08 2012

Types of Cheaters

Not all cheaters are alike. Active prowlers know this, but most people don’t. They assume that a cheater is a cheater is a cheater.  Not so. I’ve put together some descriptions of different types of cheaters.  I make no moral judgement about any of them. Some people think that sex-only cheating is worse than emotional-only …

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Jan 05 2012

Things to Think About Before You Cheat – A Public Service Announcement

Last March I published a post (9 Things to Think About Before You Cheat) that I pulled because someone I know got really freaked out about it.  I was thinking about it today, though, and I went back to revisit it.  The ideas shared in that post are good ones and should be considered by …

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